deep in thought

ok well...not really...but im always thinking abt something...been sick these past few days...sore eyes...every1 was pretty much avoiding me...i mean, they wouldnt wanna catch it..so dont blame them...just been feeling so neglected..and as usual...emotional breakdown last night...everything just seemed soooo wrong...so my eyes better...just tht the lenses r bugging me...so im half blind...will be for awhile...was planning to go for halloween night....now my fren backed down on her promises....so idk if im going or not...i know im getting rather emo...coz the seem is ending...i miss home...very much...just that when im home...i wont wanna be there...so its just like that..ill never be satisfied....maybe i should try being satisfied and then i will be...deep down i wished that people cared more....ahhh and the paranoia...i think the whole being only in the room thing kinda bugs me...plus the fact that ppl in the block itself are quite antisocial...the only ppl i know are my neighbours and a friend...so yea, u get the picture...i still feel like something is missing...i thought i didnt give myself time to think...i did... n it still feels like this...i wanna feel whole....