christmas cheer

im not even in it myself...or well not yet...comes across as stressful to me...i dont even know why...just so much to do in so little time...christmas pictures, parties, programs...all squeezed together in one week...yet my heart aches...nothing to do with xmas but it does...and then you tend to realize that some things will be like that - unbearable...was just thinking about how neglected the posts are...sometimes just cant get myself to write anything :(...besides the point..so back to the topic...xmas is in a week...i dont feel it just yet...tree is up, all the decorations..some gifts...yet somethings missing..and i have no idea what it is...part of my family is in the mood...wont mention who...i practically jump off my seat each time the phone rings...'jingle bells'...and its so loud...then the xmas jewelry...i dont even have any of that..so its odd...how different each member in the family can be..all about individuality...oh well...thinking about white christmases and stuff like that...at times i feel like i need all of that...but that pulls u so far away from the purpose of it all...it should be a little things that get it all together...makes it special...so yeah, i need to try to be happy about it all...cause its all happening so fast and before i know it, it'll be done...happy holidays!