sundays...

yeah, its sunday...back to coll 2morro...2nd sem starts on the 2nd...cant wait actually...should me more relaxing than the 1st....or well, im hoping...but doubt it...get to meet my new roomie..get my results...give back my passport...hmm...haha...sounds like there are loads of stuff on the agenda...anyways...im getting so hooked on one tree hill...seen a few seasons before...but just interests me...how complicated things get...but yet there is still hope...and things do turn around...some for the better but some for the worst...on some days i feel like im moving slightly closer to my dreams but on other days i feel like im being dragged further away...maybe its cause of ppl opinions or maybe it just happens 2 b this way...i just guess it has something 2 do with the fact that i was so uncertain in the beginning..not bcoz i didnt know what i wanted, i always knew what i wanted..but just coz of how ppl would react to my decisions...sometimes its hard...coz u'll jst always feel like ur in the background...and tht ppl dont let you b who u should be, but instead, they tell u who u should be...i think the best piece of advice when it feels like its all falling apart....never lose faith, stay strong n true to who u really are...

America's next top model (ANTM)...{transgender contestant}

Is America ready for a transgender top model?

Isis, 22, is "America's Next Top Model's" first transgender contestant. (ABC News)

Tyra Banks seems to think so -- or at least, she seems to think that a transgender model ought to be able to strut, pose and vogue alongside female hopefuls in a bid to prove she's the next big thing.
Banks' show "America's Next Top Model" will debut Isis, its first transgender contestant, when it begins its 11th season Sept. 3. It's a progressive move for a network reality series, but pushing the envelope, in the modeling realm and on TV, has become the MO of "ANTM": The show has cast multiple gay contestants, and last season crowned a plus-size model as its winner.
"We want to redefine what beauty is," said executive producer Ken Mok. "You can be tall, you can be short, you can be plus size, you can be transgender; you don't have to be what the modeling industry says you have to be. That was one of Tyra's original missions."

P.S. I love you

i always wanted to watch this...from the start when it wasnt even released...but never got 2 it...=(...so then i dcided...since its the hols..mite as well do stuff i wanted 2 do but never did....so i got my hands on this movie...it was released sometime around valentines...a real love story..and those of you who havent watched this yet, dont hesitate to! if u are into the whole romance thing, etc...u'll def. find that u love this flick...it was abt this lady Holly who was married to an average guy jerry...hes from ireland...she met him while on a coll trip there...they got married when she was 19...and 9 years later still havent had any children...her xcuse is that she isnt ready 4 kids...they cant even support themselves...they arent rich, they quarrel, but they are still deeply in love..sadly...jerry dies...he has a tumor...holly just never gets over it...so on her 30th b-day she gets a cake and a recording...jerry did it 4 her...coz he knew he wouldnt b around much longer and so he planned ahead...in the recording he said tht she will b receiving letters...tht tell her to perform a specific task..she followed them and awaited the arrival of each letter...the tasks included going out, karaoke...and a trip with her gal pals..along the journey she realizes that all the tasks are those tht are related to him...things she did with him and only made her remember him much more...she got angry at him...thinking tht hes only making this harder for her...but in the end she realizes that he just wants her to let go...fall in love again..as his life may have ended but hers is still at its beginning...she still has a long ways to go...she visits his family and lastly her mother..and she sleeps with william...jerry's fren while vacationing in ireland...and later on with a fren...(thinks that she loves him)...but then they both realize that frens is all they will ever be...in the last letter...it tells her that she wil b ok..and tht his guidance has come to an end...and even she (holly) feels that jerry's pressence is no longer with her...but yet shes happy...finally lets go slightly...but he wil always be in her heart...as they say, we should be thankful for the opportunities and xperiences we've had with ppl....and not get upset that it ended...ok yeah, we'll b devasted when things dont go our way...but just b happy that you once had tht person in your life...life goes on...just let things happen as they do and will...dont put a stop to anything!!! =)

being a sick romantic and the whole lovesick feeling..

just thought i would rite abt this...i have left the whole blog unattended...at a certain point, idk...felt like sumthins still stay personal...whether u like it to or nt...deep down everyone struggles...its more of how u handle stuff and carry on...how u pick urself up each time u fall and how fast u do it...anyhow, it varies for different ppl...some ppl find comfort in talkin abt their problems whereas some ppl r fine just keepin it all to themselves...it differs...sick romantics...i dunno...many a times, i feel like i am one...i can say i give up on love...give up on the whole idea of it...or just dont wanna think abt it...but i still do...i say i've let go of the person...left all the feelings behind...yet i havent...i can fake it and fool myself into thinking tht i can lie to myself and eventually it will just go away..and i wil move on with things..but how fast does that work? i feel like noone has the answer to this...loads of times..i feel like i can relate to certain characters in tv series n stuff...i dont know if thts naive...but i just feel that it does relate...on one way or another...i could use many ways to explain this, but ill stick to one...one tree hill...haley and nate hit it off real early...nate helps her find her happy place...n tht is with her music...she later figures out tht she cant find it without being with him...he still loves her but cant go on with the relationship...he stays mad and feels like he cant 4give her coz he cant trust her...doesnt know when he will b able to look past it...haley feels terrible...aggitated at the same time...coz she tries to regain his trust...but it just doesnt work...he loves her but just doesnt know if shes back for good and if he can trust her...so yea, two ppl who hav problems...are mad at each other...but yet, they know they love each other...just a matter of time...and they will never drift too far apart...maybe its a matter of how u feel...that feeling you get when its the right person ( at least feels right at first )....u can tell someone abt it but yet they tell u ur being stupid...but just the little things tht make it feel real...and sometimes u feel certain things are signs...like when ur abt to think tht the person just doesnt care, he/she actually does...or there are the times when u focus on it soooo much yet u arent sure whether anythin will happen...and lastly, the times when u feel the person feels otherwise, but...if they wanted to be with u...u'd totally go 4 the opportunity without a thought...the feeling of nt knowing ur circumstances...not knowing what to expect..so well...thts love...thts life...we may feel we have answers...we may feel like experience just might bring us one step closer to unlocking tht uncertainty...and so if one of us does, we could help those who never even let that thought cross their minds...but i seriously feel like nobody is ever gonna figure that out...its just a matter of finding the right person...tht person who lets u be u...n not tht other person u wish u were...just YOU...

Love and Life

love and life? two totally different things, yet in ways they are similar...think abt this...wat is love without life? what is life without love? its like they both intertwine and are related in one way or another...always cherish every opportunity that is given to you...as they say 'the gift of life is life alone'!

1st sem break!

the 1st sem break seems like a big deal...its like i was waiting 4 it the most....during finals....haha...just seemd like ahhh i need a break n now i hav it...but just thnking abt hw fast one semester went by...then ill be in my 2nd....n it will just go on n on...n soon ill b off 2 the US...a good fren of mine..is already in the US..she left yesterday..kinda sad...getting close 2 sum1 n the next sem they r already gone and ull probably never see them again...but thts just life...ppl walk in and out of our lives whether we like it or nt...its just gonna happen anyways...n espc when ur in a transfer prog n know that ppl could b leaving u anytime n ull keep continuing to make new frens...n the ppl around u are gonna keep changing as well...im gona have a new roomie next sem....cant wait! actually real excited to see how it goes this time around...i guess the last xperience toughened me up...=)...hopefully gonna go out with frens from my hometown this coming weekend...although...plans are going nowhere...they want weekends i want weekdays...i say ok 2 weekends n yet we still arent sure! neways...the hols needs sum spice! ;) 2 weeks is an awfully long time...n yeah, hoping to get my drivers license by the time the hols end...hopfuly tht goes well...=)...

emptiness

im not talkin abt smthn missing in my life...nothing close 2 that...but well...in a way...its a person..who's gone...never thot it'd feel this weird...my roomate left 2day...i was like waiting 4 this moment but yea as usual din make much of a diff..so i moved all my stuff by the window...want the view, ac, etc...n the side where i was previously on echoes...so yeah, thts weird...n she took practically everythin! even the hot pot! haha...so like i have to walk all the way to the pantry (right in front of my room)..haha...i can have two desks n stuff....jst 4 a day anyways...just enjoying it...can jump on the bed...awesome! i can put my stuff anywhere i want...choose drawers etc...n my new roomie just has 2 live with it...kinda mean but yea...thts just the way it is....just 1 last paper..then hols!!! ahhhh....cant wait..gonna b great in a way...frens planned outings n stuff..so hopefully tht works...get to see my family..havent been home 4 abt a month..so yeah, slightly homesick...cant blieve one semester went by this fast...like in a blink of an eye...n took me long enough to adapt...but it finally feels good...=)...shopping! movies! late nights! (well, i get enough of those while im here)...no studying! (just the 2 weeks) frens!......dunno how switchfoot relates to these moments but yeah...haha...easier than love, politicians, we are one tonight...n i need good music...haha...feel like im so behind on things...movies...shows....TV....TV.....something i barely get here but yeah...looking 4ward 2 all these small things...n maybe gettin a lil bit more spoilt in the process!....;)...gossip girl, ugly betty, private practice...here i come!